July 6, 2026
Gentleness is mentioned throughout Scripture in reference to both Jesus and His Father. It is also included in the fruit of the Holy Spirit: “The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience … gentleness” (Galatians 5:22–23).
The prophet Isaiah, when describing God’s power, also spoke of His gentleness: “He will tend his flock like a shepherd; he will gather the lambs in his arms; he will carry them in his bosom, and gently lead those that are with young” (Isaiah 40:11).
King David, when extolling the Lord and all He had done, included a reference to God’s gentleness. “You have given me the shield of your salvation, and your right hand supported me, and your gentleness made me great” (Psalm 18:35). The apostle Paul referred to Jesus’ gentleness when he wrote “I, Paul, myself entreat you, by the meekness and gentleness of Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:1).
As we seek to live God’s Word and to grow in Christlikeness, we will often pray for humility, patience, self-control, and to be able to resist our recurring sins. Many of us probably seldom pray for the spiritual fruit of gentleness. Gentleness is something we often consider to be part of a person’s natural disposition rather than a Christian virtue, and while most of us would consider a lack of self-control, pride, or impatience a sin, we wouldn’t see a lack of being gentle as one.
So what is gentleness? The New Testament uses a few different Greek words to express gentleness. The first, epieikeia, is generally translated as gentle or gentleness, and conveys a thoughtful, considerate, and kind outlook as opposed to one that is hotly demanding of one’s rights. It expresses the trait of seeking peace in a calm way. The second Greek word translated as gentleness is praotēs, which Paul used when listing the fruit of the Spirit. This word was linked to the medical world and conveyed the idea of mild medication, like something easy on the stomach. It also was used in reference to tamed animals. Author Randy Frazee explains:
Think about a horse. These animals weigh an average of a thousand pounds and have the potential to seriously injure or even kill human beings. Yet we can walk up to the vast majority of horses, pet them, ride them, and deem them as gentle. Is this a reflection of their power and strength? No. It is an indication of their nature—what they are like after being trained. Gentleness for a horse is a choice to allow its power and strength to be controlled. A gentle person is not a weak person, but rather someone who is strong, secure, and mature. They use their strength to face real giants and challenges in their lives but choose not to run roughshod over others.1
Gentleness is power under control. We can use our words and actions to wound others, put them down, or discourage them. Or, through gentleness, we can choose to help others, to lift them up, and to influence them for good. Even when we need to point out wrong behavior to someone, we can do so in a loving and encouraging way. The apostle Paul wrote: “If anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness” (Galatians 6:1).
Gentleness is manifested by being considerate, kind in our attitude, tender toward others, polite. Gentleness is actively showing goodness and kindness toward others by treating people in a way that shows concern and care for them. A gentle person is mild-mannered, thoughtful, and friendly. Such a person doesn’t use force to get things done but rather shows humble and genuine lovingkindness in their interactions and relationships with others.
Gentleness may be a difficult concept in particular for men, as men aren’t expected to be gentle, but to be “manly.” Gentleness is often perceived as a sign of weakness, as opposed to being tough, aggressive, and unyielding. However, rather than weakness, gentleness is actually power that is harnessed and used wisely and lovingly. We see this concept expressed in verses such as “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1).
When a person behaving with gentleness stands up for the truth and godliness, they do so in a humble and gracious manner. Gentleness is to be applied when we witness and teach or explain our faith and make a defense for our beliefs. “Always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect” (1 Peter 3:15). “The Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness” (2 Timothy 2:24–25).
We need the Holy Spirit’s help and power to be gentle in our speech, especially when we face confrontation or differing opinions. At such times it’s easy to fly off the handle and speak angry, cruel, or disparaging words. But the Spirit’s fruit of gentleness empowers us to respond with patience and respect toward others and leads us to show kindness regardless of the situation.
It’s helpful to remember the gentleness of Jesus, which can be seen in situations such as His interaction with the Samaritan woman at the well, which was a rupture with culture and traditions, since the Jews had no dealings with Samaritans. Jesus wasn’t condemning of her, but treated her with love and respect (John 4:4–29). When we read the story of the woman caught in adultery, we see that Jesus didn’t condemn her either, but loved her and forgave her (John 8:1–11). When Jesus saw Martha’s rudeness toward her sister Mary, He addressed the situation with gentleness (Luke 10:40–42).
We see God’s gentleness in His forgiveness of our sins, in the mercy He has bestowed upon us, and the patient long-suffering and steadfast faithfulness He has shown us. He is kind and gentle toward us. He is called “the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort” (2 Corinthians 1:3). As we ponder God’s gentleness and praise Him for the kindness He shows us daily, it is a good reminder that we are called to imitate His gentleness in our interactions with others.
Being gentle does not mean being gullible or naïve. Jesus told His disciples to be wise as serpents and harmless as doves (Matthew 10:16). Gentleness is not about letting people take advantage of us in order to manipulate us for their own purposes. Neither do we need to give in to others on issues we should stand firm on and be uncompromising about. But we can be gentle in our approach, even when taking a stance on a moral issue. Gentleness should be applied with wisdom.
What are some of the ways in which gentleness is manifested? It is visible in the demonstration of respect for the personal dignity of others. It is thoughtfulness, bearing in mind that others are different from us, and have differing opinions and feelings, and showing respect for those differences. It is the avoidance of blunt speech and an abrupt manner, and seeking rather to interact with others with sensitivity and respect, showing consideration to all, and when necessary, seeking to change a wrong opinion by persuasion and kindness rather than by domination or intimidation. Gentleness is manifested in our caring about others, actively seeking to make them feel at ease, or restful in our presence, treating them as we would like to be treated, with love, respect, and kindness.2
The apostle Paul wrote about the importance of walking in gentleness: “Walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace” (Ephesians 4:1–3). He also directed believers “to speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people” (Titus 3:2).
Sometimes it’s most difficult to be gentle with those who are closest to us. We become familiar, and we are faced with their faults, idiosyncrasies, and annoying habits on a daily basis. We can become short-tempered, unkind, impatient, and even harsh. But the people closest to us also deserve our gentleness, patience, care, and consideration. It is helpful to remind ourselves that we likewise have plenty of faults, habits, and idiosyncrasies that others are gentle with and kind enough to overlook or forbear. That realization helps to foster gentleness when we interact with others.
If we want to grow in Christlikeness, we will seek to grow in gentleness. Jesus said: “Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls” (Matthew 11:29). We can pursue gentleness by asking ourselves what the fruit of gentleness should look like in our lives and in our relationship with others. Do our attitudes and actions, behavior and conversation display gentleness? If not, we can commit to both prayer and action to cultivate this fruit of the Spirit in our lives so that we can better reflect God’s love to others.
It’s helpful to remember that God has been ever so gentle with each of us. He loves us, sent His Son to die for us, and gave us the gift of salvation. We didn’t have to earn it or labor for it; it was a gift He gently bestowed upon us. May this fruit of the Spirit be manifest in our lives, as we strive to “pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, steadfastness, gentleness” (1 Timothy 6:11). May the gentleness of Jesus shine through us as we reflect Him and His love to others.
Originally published August 2017. Adapted and republished July 2026. Read by Jon Marc.
1 Randy Frazee, Think, Act, Be Like Jesus (Zondervan, 2014), 210.
2 The points in this paragraph are summarized from The Practice of Godliness, by Jerry Bridges (NavPress, 2010), 206–207.
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